As Seen On Facebook | oh, the hate mail is thick today. Good, pay attention … I Wear The Shoes … via Eve Reiland

oh, the hate mail is thick today. Good, pay attention:

I wear the shoes of the disabled, often unable to communicate with language, and needing an incredible amount of care.

I wear the shoes of a autistic person who was abused severely by caregivers: physically, emotionally, financially, sexually and more.

I wear the shoes of the abused, vulnerable and totally dependent person when the caregiver was “venting” and getting all the sympathy points …

I wore the shoes while hearing my caregiver “vent” how much work it was to care for me. Me: The burden. The disabled. The problem.

This caregiver got something from that exchange … and the others too. I don’t understand what or why their “vent” sessions became what felt like a pleasurable past-time for them.

I know the abuse I suffered. I know what it’s like to be without words, cared for in public and in the eyes of others. And punished, starved, and more for my disabilities in private.

Filicide and abuse is so real. The acceptance of it towards autistic people is horrific. It doesn’t start with the headlines in the news. It starts here … and it must be stopped.

There’s a difference between support groups and echo chambers justifying abuse.

I wear the shoes.

  • Betty Webb ❤️ Continue fighting the good fight, sister!
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  • Terri Schmidt Farrell Yet you feel it ok to viciously attack others? You cannot both be the victim and attack other victims. Empathy, love and positivity vs. parent trolling and spewing diatribes filled with hate
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    • Lindsay Mohler wow. assuming she intended to attack others from the get go is not helping here.
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    • Maria Vidinha Terri Schmidt Farrell omg get over yourself
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    • Terri Schmidt Farrell Maria Vidinha go read the blog posts before you spout
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    • Lindsay Mohler Terri Schmidt Farrell we never said anyone was perfect.

      However, you don’t understand psychology and how conflict works. There is healthy conflict and unhealthy conflict. You are so focused on what SHE did, that you’re not paying attention to what anSee More

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    • Lindsay Mohler Being autistic is being herself. And yes, we have different cognitive structures than you all do. Read this blog if you’re so upset by what Eve has said. https://autisticmama.com/please-stop-complaining…/…
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      Please Stop Complaining About Your Autistic Children
      AUTISTICMAMA.COM
      Please Stop Complaining About Your Autistic Children

      Please Stop Complaining About Your Autistic Children

    • Maria Vidinha Terri Schmidt Farrell I read it. How the fuck that woman is the victim? Are you a victim as well?
      Do you want a solution? Stop bashing your kids online because we are watching and you will be exposed
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    • Maria Vidinha I’m autistic and you are not going to gaslight me .
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    • Pamela Ehn Munchausen by Proxy, Autism Edition, strikes again.
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    • Nat Le Brun Terri Schmidt Farrell how about you back the fuck up and listen to the voices of people who are actually autistic?
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    • Katherine Finelli Vetro Terri Schmidt Farrell
      Your example here only further divides us and hope that is not your point. I am not dismissing the victim bullying ( look it up, its common in Autistics)

      I am not minimizing your experiences as a parent but this is not a cause to our lives. A childs best shot in my opinion is with parents who can thrive and model good examples. We fight eachother and we achieve nothing. Instead of breaking down barriers and equitable supports to persons and families who need it the most. Allocating resources and rights needs to be based on due process, scientific evidence and best practices etc..

      Your example comes across like a man coming onto a women’s rights activist page and shaming her after she has shared a vulnerable personal message. Mansplaning how her advocacy hurts mens feelings and she needs to man up and stop acting like such a girl. How dare she be angry and hurt at the same time. That she can not demand rights and advocate against abuse because you know better because you are a man and a father. That daddy knows best about raising a women.

      Lets focus on taking down barriers etc..

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  • Jessica E Schneider You can absolutely call out nasty parents and still be a victim like wtf.
    That’s the whole point.
    Victims do get to be nasty to abusers.
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    • Terri Schmidt Farrell Jessica E Schneider nasty payments? Eve is being the abuser
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    • Jessica E Schneider Terri Schmidt Farrell I didn’t say anything about payments.
      She is not abusing anyone. She’s exposing them. If someone is hurting their child and you punch them in the face, you’re not the bad guy. Not sure what’s hard to understand about that.
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  • Jessica E Schneider People can shriek about empathy and positivity and love all day but they’re murdering us soooo. Keep on fighting the good fight.
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  • Eve Reiland The upset is I posted screens from a “private group” — Abuse. Must. Be. Addressed. And. Stopped. The group is titled the Ugly Side of Severe Autism — and came to my attention with the hot sauce. https://internationalbadassactivists.org/…/as-seen-on…/
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    Ugly Side of Caregivers | … A tear dropped size of hotsauce on my finger swiped across my sons front teeth for violence … w/note via Emma Dalmayne
    INTERNATIONALBADASSACTIVISTS.ORG
    Ugly Side of Caregivers | … A tear dropped size of hotsauce on my finger…

    Ugly Side of Caregivers | … A tear dropped size of hotsauce on my finger swiped across my sons front teeth for violence … w/note via Emma Dalmayne

  • Gary Hill Keep fighting, lead with you left. Save your right for the knockout.
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  • Lindsay Mohler Eve, I’m so proud of you! Being a leader isn’t easy, and we usually have to address the not-so-easy stuff that other typically don’t usually have to worry about. Don’t let the stress of things get to you.

    And also, block them if they continue to harass.

    And we deserve a better society.

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  • Eve Reiland Going to share some messages from my morning here … she’s right, I’m not nice.
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  • Eve Reiland been called worse.
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  • Eve Reiland fact of the matter I was gross yesterday. Hadn’t showered in four days due to sensory issues. Finally got up enough energy and did it tho.
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    • Nat Le Brun Dear Eric, hot sauce for someone with sensory issues can be akin to torture. Fuck off
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    • Gina-Marie Cheeseman What folks like that Eric don’t get is that if it’s shared publicly it ain’t private.
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  • Eve Reiland this one is super proud to be pro-contagious disease.
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  • Eve Reiland Well, 70% of the autistic population is non-hetero. I, myself, am pansexual. Though, true, I can’t speak for a gay man. I have a friend though, Jim Otey – he can answer your questions.
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  • Eve Reiland Twunt is a much better word.
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  • Eve Reiland she likes me. she really likes me.
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    • Eve Reiland tho not as good as the news media campaign that went as a hit out on me last year.
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  • Eve Reiland there’s more but my brain is overloaded from processing reading atm.
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  • Keri Waterworth If you know how it can be, why go out of your way, lie to get in closed groups and then sneakily screenshot and take them to other groups and verbally abuse the poster, but in a way they dont see and then cant defend themselves. To me you have put a lot of people in a situation that they can not defend themselves. You should be ashamed of yourself
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  • Keri Waterworth I dont think you quiet understand what you have caused with what you have done. A lady is in pieces over this. But as long as you get your screenshots out it doesn’t matter does it. The posts you have shared were from a closed group, of which you lied to get into it. Do not justify this, its sick and it’s wrong
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    • Nat Le Brun Keri Waterworth how about force feeding a child in meltdown hot sauce is wrong? Did you think about that? No. Would you like to be force fed anything? I suspect not.
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    • Maria Vidinha You are naive if you think closed groups are a safe place to share bigotry. Welcome to web, what you share will never be erased
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  • Jóhanna Katrín Svansdóttir Keep punching up, darlin’.
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  • Gina-Marie Cheeseman I’m just so damn amazed that they think an internet forum is private. They share hate filled stuff publicly and they get mad at Eve who exposes them.
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  • Gina-Marie Cheeseman One more thing. You are getting nasty comments because you touched a nerve. Keep going, Eve! This neuro-typical person supports you totally!
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  • Eve Reiland They’ve coordinated an attack tried with wordpress, twitter, other places and been calling places I’m associated with to get me removed. Fun stuff.
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  • Eve Reiland So now at this point, they are actively trying to silence autistic voice — right down to my community.
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  • Eve Reiland nothing new here. 30 years of it.
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  • Bonnell Keller Eve if you ever need any help, you know I am willing to be there for you. I’m so sorry you are going through this crap again.
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  • Gina-Marie Cheeseman Just got into with one of the nasty commenters. She claimed to be a legal advocate, but when I asked her to cite specific cases where a social media post being shared is considered an invasion of privacy, she responded with vague quotes about the law. She’s full of b.s.
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    • Danijela Turner Her profile indicates she is a support worker. Recent posts on her page also describe how she works x nightshifts in a row. She’s also an anti-vaxxer and blames vaccines for her now adult son’s autism. She’s desperate to get these screenshots deleted so clearly masqueraded as someone from the legal profession to instal fear. Rather revolting. I’m betting she’s actually a member of the group from where these screenshots were taken. We are looking at an angry, spiteful anti-vaxxer who probably still hasn’t come to terms with her son being autistic some 26 years later (particularly so if she is still providing continuous care to him living with her). Precisely the type of parent these hateful, negative, pessimistic FB groups attract.
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    • Gina-Marie Cheeseman That just shows you how nasty that group is and the lengths they will go in attacking those who expose them. I think blocking them is the best thing to do as they are just trolls.
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