via Kaelan Rhywiol-Feral Autistic Idiot
Let’s do this. If this is too much for you, you can mute the hashtags
#KaeEditsAUWE and#ElmoMum Pinning the tweet and I’ll do this one the same way as the other. Chapter by chapter breakdown w/commentary and quoted words.
“Before I start reading AUTISM UNCENSORED: PULLING BACK THE CURTAIN by Whitney Ellenby I need to say a few things. I became aware of the book last night when I the washington post article crossed my twitter feed.” – Kaelan Rhywiol
(Random most likely non-autistic photo of “sad boy” used from Pexels. WA Post Story Used an iStock photo to represent Autistic boy, wearing red, facing a wall.)
Bystanders were horrified. But my son has autism, and I was desperate.
“What I did to help my 5-year-old autistic son overcome his intense fear of indoor spaces might not have been right or even safe. Doctors didn’t recommend it. The people who witnessed it were appalled, understandably. I don’t suggest this for others.
I could have been more patient with conventional methods, but I wasn’t. I am not certified in restraining children, though doctors say anyone attempting what I did should be. They would also recommend a much slower approach.
I am writing this because I hope to educate people about the burden families face when their autistic children have tantrums in public spaces, so next time you witness such a struggle you don’t immediately resort to blaming the parents. I’m also reaching out to fellow parents in pain to remind them to cast off shame, because I believe nothing is more important than getting your autistic children out into the world.” – Whitney Ellenby
Before I start reading AUTISM UNCENSORED: PULLING BACK THE CURTAIN by Whitney Ellenby I need to say a few things. I became aware of the book last night when I the washington post article crossed my twitter feed.
First, my credentials. My training & job experience is in Biophysical anthropology/forensic chemistry & in education. I got my MST in World History, & honestly, I’m grateful I’m a late diagnosed autistic because if I’d been told what so many autistic kids are told,
that I *couldn’t do* what I’ve already done, well, I probably wouldn’t have been able to do it. Not through any lack of my own ability, but because the world wouldn’t have let me.
I’ve worked as a crime scene tech & as a high school history teacher, this is relevant because it so sharply contrasts with what my day-job is now. I’m an author & a book editor. I developmentally edit & write books for a living. I also review books via Goodreads, Amazon,
Indigo, B&N & my website. I have a bit of a reputation as being a harsh reviewer. I am honest, though. Being autistic, it makes me feel really horrible to be anything LESS than honest. So I perhaps have a unique perspective to offer in reading books like these.
But my most important qualification isn’t anything I studied for, nor is it anything I get paid to do.
I’m a parent of two autistic kids, & married to an autistic man. I am autistic, & anything I share about my family in the course of my live tweeting of this book is shared with express permission. I think I keep reading & reviewing these ‘autism martyr mommy’ books in hopes
one of them will prove me wrong & ACTUALLY be a person *I’d* want for a mom. Or even a person I’d be okay calling a friend.
I suppose eventually people will wise up & stop sending me review copies of this kind of book, but they haven’t yet. As I do with ALL of my reviews, I’ll review UAWE (Autism Uncensored/Whitney Elleby) with an open mind & an even hand.
If I like something about the book or the author’s words, I’ll say so, if I agree with something, I’ll say that too. If I find something reprehensible I will not hold back. I’m just gonna lay the content warnings out now. The last time I read one of these kinds of books,
I tried to keep it PG. I’m not going to try that this time, so content warning on language. I have the mouth of a trucker. If it’s as bad as the linked WaPo article makes me think it might be, I’ll talk about alcohol & food, because these are comforting things to me.
If it makes me puke, I’ll say so, not to be vulgar, but because these kinds of books have actually done that to me before. I’m going to TRY this time to do this in chapter length sections, but it may get to the point where I’ll have to just finish it or risk never picking it up
again. That happened with the other book. And since last time I did one of these, I got asked a LOT for my links, here they are. I’m not asking, that’s not why I do this, but this IS a lot of emotional labour, so if it’s of value, you can tip me if you feel so inclined.
The real reason I do this has nothing to do with anything except me trying my damnedest to make a better world for my kids. I can’t lay down the fight. If it were just me? I probably would. This sort of stuff HURTS. It really does. A LOT.
But until the world starts treating autistics better? I’ll put on my armor, lift my broken lance & tilt at yet another windmill. Remember if it’s too much, you can mute the following tags.
#KaeEditsAUWE#ElmoMum Do both, bcs while I’ll do my best to label them all, I’m human
About Book on Amazon:
“And when in the grips of a public tantrum, amidst the horror and humiliation of him shrieking and splayed out on the floor while strangers recoiled in shock, my mind lurched towards an inescapable truth–that I want out from this nightmare. I want out from this child.”
So begins the turbulent ride of one parent’s decision, crafted in despair and desperation, to abandon traditional interventions for her autistic son in favor of a “hands on” approach of repeatedly exposing her son to real-world settings. Autism Uncensored is an unrestricted portal into the mind of someone who had no intention of sacrificing her career or life for Autism, unaware of the many ways it would irreversibly redefine both. As she clarifies at the outset, “this is not the story of a miraculous breakthrough or recovery,” Zack is still very much autistic and always will be. It is instead the true, real-time account of her decision to allow Zack to indulge in the very behaviors that formal therapies sought to extinguish, to disclose Zack’s diagnosis in public settings, and to repeatedly expose him to real-world situations and override his tantrums regardless of public ridicule or scorn.
Autism Uncensored goes where no other book dares–revealing the private disgrace and self-blame about having a “defective” child; the near disintegration of marriage; the failure of the traditional behavioral interventions; and the mercenary way in which service providers prey on parents’ desperation for a cure. It is a personal manifesto about how a socially integrated life is attainable regardless of whether a child overcomes the major limitations of Autism, sparking a new conversation which goes beyond simply accepting persons with Autism for who they are, but considers pushing them beyond their comfort zones to learn who they are capable of becoming. An unstoppable ride with jolting twists and turns, Autism Uncensored will leave you exhilarated, informed and still gasping for air.
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Reblogged this on QuirkyBirdWords.
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